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Deviousness `anmari has been spreading her infectious positivity throughout our community for over 6 years. Throughout this time Ana has been at the core of all things devious, passionately developing an eclectic gallery, helping organise devmeets, participating in chat events and also recently completed dedicating her time as a Community Volunteer. We are absolutely delighted to bestow the Deviousness Award for May 2013 to `anmari, congratulations! Read More
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Sta.sh
I remember I had this seating change and I sat beside this jerk who called me ugly and fat all the time and a whole bunch of other dumb names when I was insecure about my body image, and when I actually listened to what he was saying I found it really dumb and then next thing you know after about a month we had a seating change again. I also learned to accept my body a bit more now too, so I don't feel as self conscious as I used too.
Be my banner.
For a big part of my life, I was depressed and no one ever knew because I usually hid behind a mask of a smiling face. Being bullied has turned me into a very sensitive person, but a very patient one at the same time. Many tedious things don't bother me like they bother others. Because I was constantly followed around and harassed every day for a whole year and nothing is more tedious and stressful than that. However, those little jokes about how I look still hit a soft spot of me and I usually tear up or hide my face from people.
I've seen you around at school for a lot of years before I started talking to you. I heard rumors and terrible insults, but I always defended you because it's just not right to say those things about someone you don't know. It just makes me uncomfortable when people do that. So that's why I try to hang out with you as much as I can. Because I knew you were a good artist and I always felt we might have a lot in common.
I'm glad that it's stopped now though, it makes thing easier for everyone.
What a bunch of assholes. I think being short is cute. I'm glad I'm tall though, but I've found short people to be adorable. You and ~PandaParadoxx are both short compared to me, and it's just so adorable. I don't get why anyone would make fun of someone for it. I sometimes pick on my brother though for being short, but that's to be expected of me. xD
You have a nice nose. Why do people need to be such assholes. >:C
Also, short haircuts are cute too. It's common to be made fun of for having short hair when you're a girl.. Idk why.. I've wanted a pixie cute for a while [though i don't because I'm fat and having short hair would make my body look fucking HUGE, even more so than it actually is. xD]
I'm so sorry dude. :c Even when I met you first off, I never had any idea you could have been sad. You pulled off a great mask, I gotta say. That isn't something anyone should need to do though..
Yeah.. I always knew people said things about me. It's because of my bisexuality in combination with my fatness and also my introversion. Being a fatty who says nothing to anyone ever sure gets you a bad rap in school. A good thing about that is teachers always LOVED me. I've always been a teacher's pet I guess. I never caused problems. My low grades just made them want to help me on my own time, which was nice. The kids were all sour and rotten though. Stupid shits they are. I appreciate you standing up for me even though you didn't know me. :3 Yeah, we have a lot in common, along with the annoying social awkwardness that makes it hard to start a conversation when we meet up.. XD
I like short hair because it stays out of the way and doesn't tangle. and it's low maintenance. xD I can deal with growing out one side, but I could never grow it all out again. I like pixie cuts too c: but i need some kind of frame because my face is a little round.
I was probably the most depressed in 7th grade. I always keep a very very slight hint of a smile in school so no one suspects I'm hurting or upset. I don't know exactly when I started that, but it's second nature now. I don't even realize I look like I'm "interested and happy to be in school" like some teachers have said. At least I don't realize it until I look around and see everyone else's neutral expressions. Another thing that masks my deeper emotions is the fact that I laugh at very stupid things. When somebody says a stupid joke or tries to be funny, I laugh anyway. Even if I don't actually find it that funny. I trained myself really well. I laugh at anything remotely silly even if I don't want to laugh! And I always laugh at myself! It's ridiculously hard not to! O.o I try to turn a lot of things into something funny because I don't like to be serious around others (except now). And for some reason I figured all this out just to be a nice person. I acted bitter towards some people in 9th grade to be funny and I regretted it. It made me feel like I was the bully. I completely stopped that last year and started acting nicer to those people. Because I changed, we're actually good friends now. I think I'm on a quest to be the best person I can be now.
Bahaha I'm a huge teacher's pet when I choose to be. xD But when I got low grades in chemistry last year, the teacher wouldn't help me and called me stupid. Sooo.. Kind of the opposite. That brought me down too.. Basically the only things that are saving me from becoming completely depressed on the outside are my passions in life and my personality. And the social awkwardness will go away over time. That always happens to me with relatively new friends. haha we'll get better! xD